Ep 48. Stay in your Lane + Trust your own Instincts

I'm Ashley!

My mission at The Purpose Gathering is to help driven momtogs like you level up, so you can build a sustainable business AND a fulfilling family life. I do that through authentic brand photography for mompreneurs and my signature program for mom photographers: Side Hustler to CEO.

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Today’s post is the last in a five-part series about the five habits that will make or break your business (Episode 44). This is an area a lot of mamas struggle with – staying in your lane and avoiding comparison. This is something that I struggled with, I currently struggle with and I will always struggle with. I’ve learned to treat this as a day-by-day decision to avoid the ‘comparison trap’, and lean into my own intuition as the CEO of my business.

Are you are stuck in the comparison trap and always looking to other’s business models to give you ideas? If so, I am here to give you some tips and insight into what I have done and what I have learned along the way.

Truth # 1: Comparison will Derail You

Comparison is a distraction, and it can be extremely detrimental to your progress. Comparing your business, your kids, your house, your body with someone else’s, leaves you super deflated and down on yourself.  This mentality of comparing ourselves to other people is distracting us from living out our true purpose.

I truly believe comparison comes from envy. We see what someone else has, what their life looks like, and we want it. We then change our focus and begin to emulate what they’re doing. This can become such a  roadblock in our productivity and leave us feeling down about ourselves for weeks.  I’ve been here before, and it leads to a dark spiral of envy. I felt broken, frustrated, and angry. I was not able to see any of the blessings that I have or what I’m grateful for.

We need to uncover what is making us feel unworthy or jealous and we need to sit with those uncomfortable feelings in order to work past them. We get so caught up in this comparison trap that we don’t see our next step because we are too busy looking at someone else and letting them influence our decisions.

Whenever you feel that comparison starting to creep in, instantly turn it into gratitude. Just because someone else is winning doesn’t mean that you never will. And I’ll be honest with you, another person’s success doesn’t threaten yours. Keep your head down, stay in your lane and stay focused on what it is that you want to accomplish. 

Truth # 2: Information Overload is Paralyzing

I have learned this the hard way, as I am such a learner at heart. I love to learn by listening to podcasts, watching YouTube videos or taking personal development courses. Unfortunately sometimes I get way too many opinions and information and it completely confuses me! When you are taking in information, allow yourself time to reflect and decide if it’s the best course of action for your business. I talk about the concept of input and output all the time on the podcast. If you have too much input and not enough output, you’re going to be overwhelmed with a million different thoughts.

It’s absolutely crucial that you process the information you’re learning. You could talk it out with someone or journal it and put your thoughts down on paper. Whenever you get new ideas in your head, quickly write them down. Then, try out the new idea at an appropriate time in your schedule. Be intentional about the new things that we implement into our business.

Truth # 3: Trusted Advisors are Not the Deciding Vote

Trusted advisors are people who share your same values and core beliefs, such as a coach, mentor, or even a good friend who’s a business owner. I consider God to be one of my trusted advisors too. Whenever I’m struggling, I look to his word and I focus on praying that my next step is in alignment with who He wants to be. It’s critical that these people in your life have the same values as you and are in alignment with who you want to be, because they can easily give you advice that doesn’t align. It’s not necessarily bad advice, but if it’s not in alignment with your values and beliefs then it can feel like a misstep.

Some people may ask what is the right number of advisors to have. I think two to three trusted advisors is plenty. The more opinions or feedback that you get on something, the more confused you’re going to be. So basically, the fewer, the better!  Trusted advisors are here to point out red flags and to call out distractions that are affecting your productivity. They hold us accountable and point out the blind spots you are unaware of.

In the past, I have found myself asking too many people who didn’t know anything about business for advice. You have to be super careful when it comes to who you go to for this feedback and advice. I want to invite you to join our free community where you can find trusted advisors who share the same core beliefs.

Even though you have your trusted advisors and their feedback, remember their opinions are only opinions and not the final vote. You have to trust your own instincts and remember you’re the CEO when you’re thinking of the next step. Ensure that this step is in alignment with who you want to be and that you’re not moving too fast or too slow to implement these changes.

One more piece of advice that I have found to be extremely helpful is a lot of times people give up right when they’re about to reach a breakthrough. We have to persevere if we want to come out victorious on the other side. I’ll never forget the words that a complete stranger shared with me. She said, “No experience is a waste of your time or your money. It’s simply a learning lesson that will help you make better decisions in the future.”

I want you to feel more confident in trusting your own instincts and vision for your business. Next time you look at other business owners, don’t be so quick to make a snap judgement and say they got a head start or took the easy way out to achieve success. In reality, we have no idea what they overcame to get where they are today.  Anybody that tells you that they ‘have it together’ is not being truthful!

So just remember that next time you’re scrolling Instagram, or you’re having a conversation with that friend… everyone is on a journey and we are all in this together.

As always mama, I am here rooting for you.


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My mission is to help fellow momtogs (mama photographers!) experience success in business and in motherhood. As an Arizona brand photographer for mompreneurs, I’m passionate about capturing authentic images that show off my clients’ unique personalities so they can connect with their ideal clients. And as an online business coach for momtogs, I LIVE for helping mamas experience incredible transformations that help them build a business they love, without sacrificing their precious time with their littles.

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